Mature The World According to Raph

Discussion in 'Journals' started by Raphael-Mitchelle, Nov 27, 2016.

  1. Welcome! If your reading this I may as well begin with a warning, this is gonna have a lot of insanity, adult themes, sexual and upsetting and general stuff you'd expect from me.

    Basically this journal is going to act as a vent or something to relieve my boredom, about things I've done, personal opinions and how my mind works. It will contain some things people may find offensive, upsetting or even hilarious and posts are probably gonna be quite long so chances are you'll get bored fairly easily. So if your interested in how I work then by all meanz read on, if not then that's cool too (probably saved yourself being bored by me anyway). The humour contained here will be very self-depreciating, its how I've always done it so you'll see me painting myself in a really negative light.

    Still here? Well don't say I didn't warn you... you can PM any discussions or views anyway I won't get offended... too much.

    So grab something and settle in, this is the world according to Raph.

    -Chapter 1: Relationship-less and the Singularity-

    Ok, here's a good one for you to start off with, did you know that I have never been in a relationship? Not a single one, in fact it all goes the same way, we talk, get close and then right as it seems its going to happen I got some bullshit excuse from them that shoves me in the friendzone. Following that the partner in question then enters a relationship and I never hear from them again. Kinda got the feeling I was being strung along. That or what I see in the mirror is what they see too in that case no wonder. But as I exited my teens and entered my twenties (I'm 25 if you wanna know) things sorta dried up for me I tried a lot of different things, meeting people, chatting with friends of friends and even once dating sites, that one went well, I got a few messages explaining how I was possibly going to be single for eternity, so I gave up on that pursuit. At first I thought I was just a case of keep going until you hit the target but around age 23 I just stopped trying, I felt an acceptance of that I'm going to remain single forever, nothing will change and there's no one out there for me, even now I believe this, believe that there's no one there for me, I'm gonna die alone. With others they used to just laugh and said it'll happen one day just be patient, but now, even they believe it, it doesn't to the self-esteem any good but the more I accepted it the less it affected me, now I don't really mind it too much, sure it would be nice to share a life with someone and not spend the time I'm not working stating at the same four walls but honestly, I don't think I have much to offer anyway, most people will believe I'm a major arsehole anyway (possibly true, matter of opinion really). So chances are my own self doubts and attitudes will leave me as the curious singularity I am, the single friend eternally (seriously I was invited to many parties that were just couples doing couple things while my arse hit the vodka) but so is life.

    (In case you were curious, no I'm not a virgin, lost that at 17)
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